The Plan

I finally came up with an idea--he didn't have a car and would soon be headed to Asia for the holidays. The winter break is long and the class load is heavy leading up to it. I had to engineer something that would increase our momentum, and let him know that I wanted to care about him. This last point is more mysterious to me. Oh well.

The following day, we both showed up at nearly the exact same time. He was on the bike. I changed and then headed over to him. I sat next to him and said hi.

He smiled, all cockiness in him was non-present. Perhaps it was because we were alone.

I asked how the studying was going. He said, its going. He said it stoically. So I grinned, and said, hanging in there? He got the jist, laughed lightly and said, yea.

I saw the book he was reading, and inquired if that was for his upcoming test. No he said, and then went through his schedule for me again.

I said, what are you working today? Back, he said, my easy day. I chuckled.

He asked what I was working. Shoulders, I said. I think I'm going to go heavy this time. I smiled, and so did he. We looked at each other. I shrugged, and said, it's definitely one body part you can't overdo. We smiled at each other again. I don't know if he was thinking what I was thinking, but despite the fact that we're both very built, his shoulders are ungodly in size, and godly in shape.

I finished tying my laces and said, I'll see you inside. He smiled and nodded at me.

Inside, I needed a spot. The first time I've ever asked for one that was sort of expected. He was very happy to give it.

He complimented me a lot on my set--Wow he said, that was a lot of reps. I smiled, got shy, said thanks--thanks a lot, and then kept working. Later, he spotted me again. He had timed it this time. Finally, I came around and started conversation about his upcoming trip. When are you leaving on that day? I queried.

7am he said. He saw my expression. yea, pretty early he said. I smiled like the devil, and said, Relatively I suppose. He thought, then smiled back, and said, Why? At what time do you wake up?

5, I said. His eyebrows went up. He looked confused, and then said with some pessimism, Why??? I pretended to wonder for a second and said, I like to start my day before anything gets crowded. He asked me my sleeping schedule. He complimented me. I went back and did more sets. I came back and asked more about his upcoming trip. Then went on again with my workout.

Suddenly, he came up to me, and said, I'll see you later. Fuck, he can't get away yet I thought. Hey, tell me if my form is right on this one, yea? I stalled.

Sure--he looked at me intently, made a suggestion. I said, shit, that makes it harder. I'll have to get a lighter weight. We walked together to the weights and door.

I raised an eyebrow, cocked my head his way, and said, wait, if you fly at 7, that means you have to be at the airport at like---5...

He hadn't apparently thought about this--and said, I guess--probably 6 really.

Finally, I broke into a sinister grin and said, how are you getting there?

He was shocked. His jaw dropped and he looked away and then down at his feet. I don't know he stammered. A taxi I guess, he said.

I smiled, and looked at him. Can I give you a ride?

We are conditioned to be so overly independent now a days. Self-sufficiency is the great Emersonian and Thoreuvian ideal that still pervades not just American thought, but most definitely Asian American thought. I had purposedly phrased the question as a request on my behalf.

He couldn't answer because of the shock. I knew it would be a bit of a shock. Asians hate accepting a favor.

Finally, I repeated with confidence, Can I?

He stammered again, could you?

YEA, I said with my enthusiasm finally breaking through the cracks.

I walked to the weights. He walked towards the door, having gotten his bag. Then I saw him get that slighlty aggressive and suspicious look that my Asians have often worn. He smiled lightly while doing this and he said--Wait, don't you have stuff to do at that time?

I said, notice how I've been less stressed lately? He smiled, and looked down. I've figured out my job better lately. Its not a problem. I'll see you at your dorm that morning.

He picked up his stuff and left--likely flattered, and even more confused.

I felt good and wierd at the same time. I had upped the antie. I had wanted to make sure he thought about me before leaving. I had wanted him to know I could be giving without necessarily expecting physical gratification--a suspicion I had later harbored when he mentioned he needed to be somwhere after dinner the other night, which incidently ended up being a study group session.