I'm obsessed with the concept of spinning. To me it represent the idea of chaos--the arising of order out of randomness. Naturally, life becomes repetitive and eventually routine. Little if anything seems to be in the boring aspects of life. But when I take a step back, I realize, shit, something is definitely going on--and it has a focal point.
For me and relationships, the focal point is: I want to be safe. I want to be the rich hottie who can, at the end of any day, give the finger to absolutely anyone and walk away. Funny thing is, I didn't think that this was my goal. But when I took a step back and observed my actions as a whole, I saw it.
Safety isn't exactly a goal that goes hand in hand with a trusting and open relationship. Safety is also fucken boring. Financial safety is cool, but the other stuff, I gotta give up.
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