It's been quite a saga. It's so long and there can be so many details, and he means so much to me that its hard to put it all onto a blog. Here's the fast version.
We met as undergrads. We had a love at first sight moment--where u bump into someone and the two of u remain transfixed for like 10+ seconds before you realize that you have not spoken. The image of his face and his incredible eyes opening to their limits as he just stared into what seemed like my soul.
We very quickly became friends. He was and has been quite possibly the hottest guy I have ever met--facially. Nothing on his face proves superfluous. Everything is striking and articulated. Its incredible.
He's not out to himself. He came onto me during the first year that we knew each other. I loved him very early on such that I did not want to have sex with him until the sex would prove meaningful. So I did and have refrained--although we have engaged in caressing. I later found out that he faked being drunk on more than one occasion just because he wanted to sleep in my bed.
He knows I know. It's almost as obvious as spots on a kid with chicken pox. Our conversations usually consist of few words. The words we use communicate volumes and yet we know precisely what we mean. Its incredible.
I told him I loved him. He has said as much to me as well in the context of an "off-handed comment" but with the tone of "I mean it." Yet, I have no doubt that he does love me.
He taught me how to love when I decided to love him unconditionally--whether or not we would ever be a couple. I then knew what it meant to love without limit.
He's perhaps the only person I know who's soul and face coincide in beauty. Seeing him for who he is -- is like peering into a star floating in the darkest of space. One could never bore because its radiance has so many colors.
He's the type who always requires a relationship. He has previously told me how long he'll keep a girlfriend and then when the time expires, she gets dumped. The girls always push him away at first--incredulous that someone so gorgeous would commit to them.
All the girls know what is up, usually within moments of him introducing me to them. Then they hate me in a way I have rarely experienced. They deny what they know and instead cling harder. Then they shout what they know when he dumps them of course.
His family is like a cult, and they have ordained him the successor. He believes in their dogma hook-line and sinker. As beautiful as he is--he was not blessed with strength. He is delicate instead. He stands no chance before his family. He knows quite well the consequences of his beauty. None can compete with the security of his kin.
I proved to him that I loved him beyond his facade. He drew closer to me as a friend and in doing so has surprised me throughout the years.
He got engaged and they picked out a church. He was catatonic when I, by accident, bumped into him and the soon-to-be misses for the first time. This summer was quite a time. He broke off his engagement and his family has decided to move to my part of the city.
We sat in the leather booth of a lowly-lit restaurant. Everything in the room was a shade of brown. Just before our entres arrived, they switched to candle-light.
We had much about which to talk. But in the midst of all that, he stopped the conversation, with, "But to get back to the big picture. I want to do a toast."
I was silent and just looked at him with curiosity and expectation as he raised his glass. He said, "I'm really really glad you're here."
I could only smile ever so slightly because I was in disbelief that anyone could be so sweet. I looked at him back with light yet piercing intensity, raised my glass to his, and said, "I'm really really glad you're here."
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