Passing the Bar

Several of my friends passed the bar today. I got the text while I was at the gym tonight. I couldn't refrain from heading over the to the main celebration. I wasn't going to go because I was in my gym garb. But apparently my friend didn't care so I headed over protein shake and all.

I love this crowd. They all work for the top firms in the city. They can be the most dull sticks in the mud, but if you get them on the right topic and in the right mood---man oh man, they are nothing short of incredible.

One girl--she does sexual harassment cases. We could laugh all night. People are JUST crazy. They're all like that. Tonight was especially cool because we had complete representation--that is, someone of every major ethnicity, religion, and orientation. We had dinner after people got drunk, and well, the conversation went there.

Hillary for President? Gay marriage? Right wing Christians? Should kids take on the male last name? It got heated. My favorite line for the night was, "Well, just bring your books... I'll bring my books and we'll compare..." It was said so calmly and yet it carried such humble and potent force. It just made so much reasonable sense. I loved it.

People got invested. Most views didn't change. But it was still just a lot of fun.

The friend who always invites me to these gatherings---she and I go way back to our undergrad days when we would mastermind the system at school. We would raise hell and few would at best scarcely know that we were at the center of it. We had the same rage within us against the establishment. Tonight, as we were all conversing, her voice and mine emerged amongst the cacophony, and eventually we made our way to the same point, and she just gave me this very knowing look. And I just knew, that in the future, we'll gang up again, and rip a new one into this place we know now as the "world". It was awesome.

Of course, there was superficiality tonight as well. One guy at the party kept commenting about how good I looked. Asked about what protein I was drinking and then eventually about what exactly my workout entailed. "Well, it's certainly working." "You look good."

It's funny. I should get used to just ignoring it.

I had just come from the gym too.

There's this guy who I've seen twice now. He's so fucken cocky. He annoys me so much because of his I'm better than u attitude.

It's been twice at the lockerroom that he stares me down while I dry off or put on my sunscreen. It's so fucken erotic. I mean, here is this super cocky, super hot guy--who is so fucken pretty and yet masculine at the same time. His face is angular and triangular. His broad eyebrows, narrow face, and mischivious lips, and melon-like shoulders, incredible ass, and lean body make me fucken want to cream every time. And yet he's hard. Not just in the physical sense, but more importantly in terms of attitude. He has a chip on his shoulder. He's like OG--the gangster swagger, the jock clothes, and the gay pretty boi features. Holy gawd.

And there he is in the lockeroom, staring me down. Overtly just staring at me, still as a cheetah awaiting its prey. And I'm dumbstruck unable to do a thing. Incredulous and frightened out of my mind that the second I open my mouth or react authentically I'll lose him, because I won't measure up.

I want him. I want him badly. I want him to be aggressive and take on me. But it's unlikely he will. Doesn't matter how buff, big, tall, hot, gorgeous, or even intelligent they are--I always have to make the first move. Am I intimidating? Many say so. Some say I'm not. Doesn't matter. I just wish he would make the move. Take the risk.

We pretend to not eye each other at the gym, until of course I see him grinning for no reason as soon as he gets near me. Oh well, he's working out with another hottie tonight. Why even try? He'll just shoot me down and use his friend to reinforce his position above me? Right?

I wonder if he's amazing bed? Does his attitude play it self out well in the sack? How big is his cock? How much pain and pleasure could he dole out on me? Could he break me in two in ecstasy?

I'll talk him up. See if he can take it from there. Maybe I'll have to manouver. Hopefully not too much.