Again

Went to the gym tonight. Lawyer was there, on the stairclimber. He had not mentioned that his bf was out of town, so before going up to him, I went looking for his bf, just to make sure I wasn't caught appearing to be overly nice.

The coast was clear and so I approached the climber. He looked up and looked surprised and then freaked out--two separate reactions. It was not what I was used to.

After the "Milkman" incident, he had been all smiles w/ me at the gym, and I took up the opportunity to tell him that I wasn't using him for outings or for a job. He asked me to lunch, and I gave him a rain chx b/c I'm swamped with work.

As I approached, I saw the reason for his odd reaction, his bf was right next to him, on another stair-climber. I made my move anyway. I got on next the climber next to the Lawyer.

"Hey, how are you?" I asked, with a smile. I gawked at his arms. He was looking extra-ripped today, but I dragged my eyes away to lean forward and wave to the bf, who non-chalantly waived at me too.

"Are you out of school yet?" he asked, exasperated and yet in an artificial tone.

"Huh?" I was confused.

"For Thanksgiving," he clarified. His tone seemed very formal, and he was avoiding looking at me. He was soooo different. I freaked out.

"Oh--No. Uhm... Uhm... Well... we don't get up right up until the day. Yea... Uhm... well... actually, on the contrary, everyone's stressed about exams," I said. I was incoherent b/c I realized he was really uncomfortable.

"Well, its good that you still find time to come here," he retorted. Gawd... WTF.

"Actually, I'm listening to my lectures on my headphones. I have my outlines w/me so if I hear something I didn't pick up the first time, I can jot it down," I retorted back. "But anyways, how are you... guys?" I asked.

"We're going out of town," he said abruptly.

I smiled. He didn't look at me.

"Cool," I said, and kept smiling.

He didn't look at me.

"Uhm..., where you guys off too?" I finally said.

"Our country home," he said.

"Aaah, nice," I responded. He didn't say anything. "Well, I just wanted to say hi," I said, smiled, and waived, and headed off.

WTF.

Later during my workout, his BF worked out near me. Waived at me all happy. I did the same

They finished their workouts and left.

25 minutes later I went to get another drink out of my locker. They had just finished showering. They were both buttoning their pants. His BF was facing me. He gave me a half smile and looked away. I looked down at his exposed torso. Ouch. I remember last time I saw him thinking he was no longer looking so good. I was right. That blows for him. Really. He doesn't really work. That's all he has to do.

I looked at the Lawyer who had his back towards me. FUCK--he had tanned. He looked AMAZING. His back was rippling with muscle as he fastened his pants on.

I walked quickly to avoid him seeing me.

I went to my locker. I decided to just take my entire bag with me back to the treadmill, instead of just my second drink. I ran my fingers through my hair. They were just buckling their pants. They could be done now. Heading out. Crap. Should I stall.

No. I was gonna be confident. I was going to be sexy. I blasted "Faster Kill Pussycat," and made my exit. As I walked out, how funny, he was now in the hallway as opposed to his aisle of his lockerroom--this way, there was no way we would not run into each other. As soon I walked out, he stopped or finished what he was doing and just stared at me, intensely. Its the most intense look he's ever given me.

The blue in his eyes even looked different. I think in part b/c of his tan. They looked like blue fire. Not just incandescent but actually bright and yet an extremely deep blue. I stared right back at him, and smiled, in an ultra-cocky way. He motioned as if he was about to look away, but when he saw how I smiled, he kept his eyes glued on to mine. While his eyes were intense, his mouth betrayed a sadness. I've seen this expression before. Its perhaps the most saddest expression I have ever seen.

While holding his eyes on me. He moved, so that I could walk by him without stopping. Then his bf came into view. I waived first at his bf, and then I turned and waived at him, but while I gave his bf a goofy smile and good bye, I gave him an intense and cocky smile. And so I walked out.

I don't know what happened. But I get the distinct feeling that he did not tell his bf the whole story. His bf probably thinks that I've rejected them on all fronts--first when he tried to lay me for several months, and then second, when the Lawyer might have purported to get me into a three way as well.