It's the most I've dated in forever. I'm on this like... mission. But in order to accommodate the added traffic, I've lowered my standards. If he's super smart, in good shape, and attractive, he'll pass. If he's got an awesome body, decent face, and a career... sure, why not?
Result? Kind of duds...
Tonight I met up with this lawyer, athlete, and DJ. Great resume huh? Good hearted guy. But not quite as happy as I would imagine. In fact, if I had to pick a determinative factor--that would be it! I didn't even realize it. How happy can you be?
Can he keep up?
I can never tell what guys think anymore either. Sometimes a guy will totally pretend like I'm no big deal, and then I'll find out he thinks I'm like really hot. Other times, a guy can't hide it. And some guys just disappear.
Today, I was nervous the entire day. My hair looks like shit. My face, though taut, was not of perfect even tone. It was driving me nuts. I have knack though for pulling off an awesome look at the last minute, so I wasn't too worried. But I also kept imagining, What would someone think if they just interviewed me and got to know alot about me? Would I be found to be wanting?
Am I a good person? Am I boyfriend material or just a fuck buddy? Am I loveable? Oh gawd.
Some guys are really dramatically attractive, but this guy was not one of them. I knew he wasn't. He had a rockin' body and was brilliant, but in terms of low light restaurant appearances, I knew I had somewhat of an advantage... which bugs me, b/c intimidation can often shut a guy down.
I don't know what this guy I thought. He seemed a bit shy. I couldn't tell why. Was it him? Was it me?
No fireworks, but u never know... and relationships are not built on fireworks. I'm learning.
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